Hi

Please cast your eyes on our new short - Ruin


Many thanks

Richard

Anyone up for some feedback on our short?

Much appreciated

Cheers

Not showing us a lot of love here are they dude?

Well, I for one liked it.

Interesting story, well acted and well shot.

Thanks mate

I thought it was very well made, well shot and edited. The direction and acting was also quite good. But I thought the story was a little too ill conceived, the ending sort of came out of nowhere. I didn't find myself feeling anything at all for the homeless man at the end nor the teens. I think you gave sufficent back story to the homelss man, which was good, but I think the surroundings didn't do justice to the story. They didn't really look all that decrepit and omnious, so I think that took some of the edge off the drama.

As for teens; We the viewer didn't see them at all until the final scene, so it sort of felt like it was thrown together, as if you didn't know how it should of ended. I'm not saying you didn't know how to wrap up the story, but thats how it came across. A possible subplot about the teens might of added some depth to the drama. But of course its a short film, so its a continuous balancing act between the amount of time you have to tell the story and how much you want to flesh out the characters.

Overall I thought it was very good. I thought it started very well but it escalated very quickly. I hope I wasn't too harsh on your film.

Good Job.


Formless.

Thanks for your response and I appreciate your feedback.

You hit the nail on the head really when you said about the 'balancing act'. That's spot on. It's difficult to fit a story and fully develop 4 or 5 characters in 7 minutes.

And I also agree that the ending was abrupt. But at the end of the day, we only had a finite amount of good footage of the teens (average age 32 lol) and the tramp in the abandoned building. And nothing else. At the end of the day, some of it was done totally off the cuff....totally ad libbed. And I guess that shows in the abrupt ending.

Thanks again for the feedback. We will learn these lessons and hopefully continue to improve.

Mark

very well shot, and edited awesome to I actually liked this alot....

Many thanks for your comments...

We're really pleased with the reception we've had for it so far. We've entered it for a few festivals around the country and it was selected for The Newport International Film Festival. It was shown yesterday afternoon.

Lovely Job! My only (slight) criticism would be the lack of b/g music through the first half... the wind noise on the mic I found a little off putting. Nicely shot though and some good, thoughtful angles.

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