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Thread: please can i have some feedback on my work

  1. #1

    Default please can i have some feedback on my work

    Hi, I would like to start off by saying I have seen some fantastic work on these forums and they have inspired me to try and make some of my own work as I have always been interested in digital video. Anyway my work wont be up to your standards but I must start somewhere!

    Anyway here goes, this is my second piece of work, my first solo. My first being a typical star wars style film where I done some rotoscoping etc, you know the usual boring stuff. I learnt a lot from that as our first attempt, we used too many long shots which resulted in jumpy footage, some facial shots etc would have broken the footage up and more camera angles would have been useful to keep the footage flowing. This was edited with a few mates as a college project using premiere. I really enjoyed this and so I went out and got a copy of Final Cut Pro for my new MacBook Pro. And this is my first attempt at using it.

    At college we were looking at visual communications and we had to create a short video to portray one of the following words 'love' 'rage' 'jelousy'. I chose to do rage. With this being visual communications we were not allowed to use any sound so it is a short silent film (only 1minute 30seconds). I done it all alone, all the preproduction and post production so this is all my own work and i am fairly proud of it as my first solo project. It took around 30mins to capture the footage and around an hour for me to edit it, the graphics didnt take long as they are nothing fantastic lol. However I also know there is a lot of room for improvement, but nevertheless here you go, let me know what you think. Thanks.

    Click Here
    Last edited by graham_tearne; 06-23-2006 at 05:35 PM.

  2. #2

    Default

    Sorry forgot to mention the file size etc. It is 1:30 long and is 2.4mb. It was compressed for the web to keep the filesize down. It is in MPEG-4 format. Sorry about the poor quality, I was just trying to keep the filesize down.

  3. #3

    Default

    Nice job, The "beatings" could have been a little closer so it would look more realistic. Other than that it was good.
    Wil

    Software Used:
    TGV Edius 6, TGV ProCoder 3, DVD Lab Pro. 2

    http://www.youtube.com/user/ChapmanProduction

  4. #4

    Default

    Thank you for the feedback. I understand that the 'beatings' as you said look very unrealistic. I wasnt too bothered about re-shooting it however as my main objective was to get the post production work done to a decent standard. There is the odd jump (i.e the penalty just before I strike it), but these I thought were minor points as the cameraman hadnt used a camera before!

    Thanks for the feedback
    MacBook Pro 2GB Ram with Final Cut Studio 5.1

  5. #5
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    Got no sound here, but it looks interesting. Wont comment at length till i get the sound working but the editing looks cool, the added espn bits are great. The fight looks a bit fake, the best way is to kick for real, just not too hard !

    The camera work is a bit shaky. Any movement on the camcorders small screen always looks much greater in the the finished film.

  6. #6

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    it is supposed to have no sound, i had to produce a silent film to show rage, and thats what i came up with.
    MacBook Pro 2GB Ram with Final Cut Studio 5.1

  7. #7
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    Oh, should have read post better, will have another look.

  8. #8

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    I'm always a little reluctant to start 'pontificating' about other peoples efforts especially as I am no great film maker myself however, I critique as a viewer and I guess that gets me out of jail!

    I thought that the fundamental idea was good, particularly the interpretation of the task. Now for the criticism...............hold your hand steady now boy!

    1. 'Thwack!' - Your film was a lazy effort with no attention to props and costumes (I am sure that you could have arranged some football kit!)
    2. 'Thwack!' - You could have made the production more dramatic by showing the rage contorted faces of the players.
    3. 'Thwack!' - There were very few cutaways to detailed shots of the ball for instance, when the player took the penalty, why didn't you go for the close up of the ball being struck?
    4. 'Thwack!' - Hasn't anyone at your college got a tripod??? (or at least a steady hand?!)

    'Thwack!' 'Thwack!' 'Thwack!' 'Thwack!' (oops - got carried away..........)

    Now boy - Take a thousand lines..........."I promise never to give my teacher as much 'Thwacking' pleasure by producing such a crap film"

    Only kidding - it was a bit raw but hey, you had loads of fun and I look forward to the next one!

    Good luck!
    Last edited by Skodster; 06-26-2006 at 06:31 PM.
    Visit my website at www.still-in-motion.co.uk

  9. #9
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    skodster, you don't have to be a prolific film-maker to comment on how you received others' work.

    I can't play the piano myself, but I know when someone's playing rubbish.

    Fair points, good points, agree wholeheartedly.

    Thwack! More mistress please...ooops, wrong forum.

  10. #10

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    reminds me of the Portugal game on Sunday

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