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Thread: Kevin, vancouver, comedy attempter: would love some feedback

  1. Default Kevin, vancouver, comedy attempter: would love some feedback

    Hi Im Kevin! I have just made my first movie and it is charming, emotional, hilarious, and none of those things all at once! It is about my experiences delivering pizzas and it was shot in an actual pizza restaurant. It was a lot of fun to make and I hope you like it! I would love some constructive feedback!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bLVq_-Yt4YY

    Thanks! every view helps support my tomato garden

  2. #2
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    OK. I think a series of gags and/or a series of characters based around a pizza delivery store has potential.
    Your image quality was good, but there was an inconsistency of style - there was no apparent reason for some shots being shot on a tripos and others hand held.
    You really need to ensure your shots are level. Unless your shots are tilting up or down, look to get the vertical lines vertical (make them parallel with the side of the viewfinder). Horizontals will only ever be parallel to the viewfinder if the shot is "flat" ie the subject is perpendicular to the line from the camera to subject.
    You absolutely need to work on audio. Your audience will give up very soon if they have to struggle to listen to hear the dialogue.
    On the other hand use of incidental audio added interest.
    But you really need to run your script by other people before making the next one. What you think is funny might be. But them again it might not. Test it out before investing the time and effort in production.
    Good ucj with the next project.
    Tim

  3. Default

    Quote Originally Posted by TimStannard View Post
    OK. I think a series of gags and/or a series of characters based around a pizza delivery store has potential.
    Your image quality was good, but there was an inconsistency of style - there was no apparent reason for some shots being shot on a tripos and others hand held.
    You really need to ensure your shots are level. Unless your shots are tilting up or down, look to get the vertical lines vertical (make them parallel with the side of the viewfinder). Horizontals will only ever be parallel to the viewfinder if the shot is "flat" ie the subject is perpendicular to the line from the camera to subject.
    You absolutely need to work on audio. Your audience will give up very soon if they have to struggle to listen to hear the dialogue.
    On the other hand use of incidental audio added interest.
    But you really need to run your script by other people before making the next one. What you think is funny might be. But them again it might not. Test it out before investing the time and effort in production.
    Good ucj with the next project.

    Thank you for the feedback I appreciate you helping me out. You gave some great advice and I will try to emulate your suggestions in my next video. Hope you at least laughed once during the video though!

  4. Default

    Thank you!

  5. #5

    Default

    Some more tips on the audio: Try to use shotgun or lavalier mics and record samples of room sound (that's when there is no other sound) so that you can remove it in post.

  6. Default

    Quote Originally Posted by XXLRay View Post
    Some more tips on the audio: Try to use shotgun or lavalier mics and record samples of room sound (that's when there is no other sound) so that you can remove it in post.
    Thank you! I never would have thought to do that

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