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Thread: Sad Dog

  1. Default Sad Dog

    I came across this poor dog a few days ago and decided to video it. I ran into the lady that owns it yesterday and she said she gave it away.

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    Generally I think that it's quite well made but it falls down on the content.

    As a short "piece" it still needs the three elements of a story: Beginning, middle, end.

    It has a beginning "I was walking down the road and saw this unfortunate dog.

    The middle is a bit thin. It needs an explanation. "The dog was obviously undernourished. I spoke to the owner who said she couldn't afford to feed it, so I thought I'd give it a treat." This can be done in a voice-over during the montage of street scenes and the buying of a sausage.

    The phrase "People here, a lot of them, they just don't know any better" is very condescending and a bit colonial-racist. Far better would be something like "The local Filipinos don't have the same feeling to pets as we do in the west. They don't have our empathy towards animals and this can be a bit disconcerting."

    Finally, just giving the dog a sausage and then leaving it in the same situation as before seems cruel. A final voice-over like " The owner decided that the dog would have a happier life with someone else and gave it to a nearby family" would round off the piece nicely.

    Apart from that - nice images. You just need to tell a story.

  3. Default

    It has a beginning, middle, and end. I find a dog looking depressed and hungry, I get a hot dog, dog eats it an eases some of it's pain and looks to be in a bit of a better mood. Basically, dog goes from miserable to looking a lot better in a minute.

    Also, I couldn't have said, "I spoke to the owner who said she couldn't afford to feed it, so I thought I'd give it a treat." because that's not what happened. I was finishing filming, the dog had already eaten, and she came over and said it was her dog and she never said she couldn't afford to feed it. Maybe that is a bit condescending to assume that is her reason.
    I just added the part mentioning her so people would understand that she doesn't mean to be a cruel person and I didn't want to demonize her.

    Also, I couldn't put a voice over saying the owner decided to give the dog to someone else that could give it a happier life because the video was already online for a few days and just yesterday I went to check on the dog and she came over and said she said she gave it to her sister but did not state why. She also asked me if I would like a puppy.

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    Not everyone has the balls to take an insightful critique. If you're not looking for potential pointers or get the benefit of a technical review, can I suggest you post in just for fun? If you post here, we assume you want your work reviewed, so will point out potential areas for improvement. No work is perfect, so you will always get tips. You may not take them up, or agree with them, but you invited them.

  5. Default

    So now I don't have balls because I explained that his suggestions would have been impossible because it would have involved predicting the future to know what she was going to tell me? I didn't even say that is his fault, I was just explaining to him that was the case because he didn't know.

    Marc, you are just making yourself look as silly as you did in your post as to why you don't know why youtube exists.
    Last edited by Poolboy; 09-03-2013 at 01:58 PM.

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    Dude, not everything is a personal attack.

  7. Default

    It's like you tried to say I didn't have the balls to take what he said when all I did was explain to him some of his suggestions were not possible or did not happen the way he thought they did.

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    The thing is.... You're trying to make television.

    Television isn't just about pointing a camera at something, it's not just about the images, it's about the story.

    Your story is "I saw a dog, it looked hungry, I gave it a sausage, the end."

    That is not interesting. You need to show why the dog is hungry. If you don't know, ask. If you didn't ask, then simply making comments like "People here, they just don't know any better." is ignorant and condescending. It is rude, implying that you are superior because you "know better". You think you haven't demonized her but instead you've made her into an ignorant native who "doesn't know any better".

    My suggestions for voice-over explanations are just that. Suggestions. A good film-maker would research the subject during the filming and be able to put in the appropriate text.

    In television you can make assumptions like "the owner couldn't afford to feed it", the other alternative is "the owner couldn't care less". Or you have to comment that "I couldn't find the owner at the time."

    In the same way, once you knew what the ending was (she got rid of the dog) you should have updated the video. Even if it was just adding an end-title explaining "The owner has since given the dog to her sister".

    If you're not prepared to put a bit of effort into the piece then you just end up with.

    "I saw a hungry dog, I gave it a sausage, and I left it"... No story. Boring.

  9. Default

    I don't know exactly what you mean by I am trying to make television. Could you explain that?

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    Okay, you're not just doing a holiday video, you are trying to make something people who don't know you will watch.

    You have a "presenter". You have a scenario. You want it to be interesting.

    This is "television". It doesn't matter if it's on youtube, vimeo or whatever.

    So, you have to go further than just standing in front of the camera. If you are doing "documentary" work, which presumably you are, since this is not "fiction" you have to "inform, entertain and educate". Tell the viewer something they didn't know, keep them entertained and leave them knowing more than when they started looking.

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