Results 1 to 9 of 9

Thread: 2 Minute University Assignment Short Film. Tips?

  1. #1

    Talking 2 Minute University Assignment Short Film. Tips?

    Hi,
    I'm currently studying film at university in London. For our most recent assignment we were given a script from a film (without being told what the film is) and were told to create a film from that script.
    Here is this film:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HXlyBy_qQ_o

    The film is titled 'The Kid on the Beach'. If at all possible, could you please check it out and let me know what you liked/what you would improve?

    Thank you so much,
    Chris Brooker
    Got a moment to spare? Check this out
    http://www.youtube.co.uk/ChrisMiBrooker


  2. #2

    Default

    Apart from the fact that it's driving me crazy not knowing were the script is from, I liked the lighting and camera work. I think there was far to many titles a the end. There was only 2 actors and three crew. The end credits should reflect that and not repeat Chris did this and he did that and this and Luke did the sound but Chris also did this and that.

  3. #3

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Midnight Blue View Post
    Apart from the fact that it's driving me crazy not knowing were the script is from
    AFAIK, it comes from a 1994 film named ""Casa de Lava". Casa de Lava (1994) - IMDb

  4. #4

    Default

    Blimy Tim, you're the man.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Surrey, UK
    Posts
    10,849
    Blog Entries
    1

    Default

    I like the opening shot, but the camera is on the piss - all the buildings are leaning.
    You probably have a reason, but I did not like the framing in many of the shots -the eye lines seemed too high and you frequently cut the tops off heads. The worst case of this is in the two shot at fro example 0:20 where the guy's head is (mostly) in frame and the girl's head is chopped off halfway sown. I can see the faming for this is to get the guy's hands in (and the urn) but you really need to keep an eye on the seconday subject - especially as she has lines and attention is therefore drawn towards her (and I suspect the deliberate wobbliness only emphasises this.
    0:49 he obsucres her througout this shot. I know he is speaking but we get so sense or reaction and are distracted by the fact she's obscured.
    I lived the cameramovement throughout the whole of the final shot. Perhaps a touch longer pause before the final tilt would have worked?
    Overall I liked the treatment, though I think it would have benefitted with much more in the way of close-ups and even ECUs. This could have directed our empathy - are we idenfying with the enquiring mind of the girl or the emotion of the guy? As it stands I'm leaning towards the guy, but I'm only a touch away from being an entirely neutral observer.

    Normally I 'd agree with Midnight's comments about credits, but as this was a university piece it is probably beneficial, possibly a requirement, to identify who was responsible for what aspects.
    Tim

  6. #6

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Midnight Blue View Post
    Apart from the fact that it's driving me crazy not knowing were the script is from, I liked the lighting and camera work. I think there was far to many titles a the end. There was only 2 actors and three crew. The end credits should reflect that and not repeat Chris did this and he did that and this and Luke did the sound but Chris also did this and that.
    Thank you that means a lot to me, I'm really glad you enjoyed it. The credits annoy me too, but we were required for the assignment to identify each role and who was responsible for the completion of those roles
    Got a moment to spare? Check this out
    http://www.youtube.co.uk/ChrisMiBrooker


  7. #7

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by TimAndrews View Post
    AFAIK, it comes from a 1994 film named ""Casa de Lava". Casa de Lava (1994) - IMDb
    Oh wow! That's incredible
    Got a moment to spare? Check this out
    http://www.youtube.co.uk/ChrisMiBrooker


  8. #8

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by TimStannard View Post
    I like the opening shot, but the camera is on the piss - all the buildings are leaning.
    You probably have a reason, but I did not like the framing in many of the shots -the eye lines seemed too high and you frequently cut the tops off heads. The worst case of this is in the two shot at fro example 0:20 where the guy's head is (mostly) in frame and the girl's head is chopped off halfway sown. I can see the faming for this is to get the guy's hands in (and the urn) but you really need to keep an eye on the seconday subject - especially as she has lines and attention is therefore drawn towards her (and I suspect the deliberate wobbliness only emphasises this.
    0:49 he obsucres her througout this shot. I know he is speaking but we get so sense or reaction and are distracted by the fact she's obscured.
    I lived the cameramovement throughout the whole of the final shot. Perhaps a touch longer pause before the final tilt would have worked?
    Overall I liked the treatment, though I think it would have benefitted with much more in the way of close-ups and even ECUs. This could have directed our empathy - are we idenfying with the enquiring mind of the girl or the emotion of the guy? As it stands I'm leaning towards the guy, but I'm only a touch away from being an entirely neutral observer.

    Normally I 'd agree with Midnight's comments about credits, but as this was a university piece it is probably beneficial, possibly a requirement, to identify who was responsible for what aspects.
    Hi, thank you ever so much for the honest feedback. You're correct, the main focus was the male character, the female character was just there as a comforter really. I like your idea of the use of CU's and ECU's, I think the use of close up's would help to show more detail.
    At 0:49, that was a production fault, we only had the one shot covering that small phase.. there was a member of the public in the background of one shot and then the boom mic in the foreground of the other shot, so we had to reluctantly include that shot within the film.
    And yes, you're very correct with your last comment, this was merely a requirement in order for the assessor to identify job roles.

    Thank you ever so much again for your feedback
    Got a moment to spare? Check this out
    http://www.youtube.co.uk/ChrisMiBrooker


  9. Default

    Hey Chris! After what Tim said there's not much left to argue about, hehe. I'd like to point out the coloring work though, it was really well done so the image looks great.

    Besides that, major flaws would be the actors, which in my opinion speak too quickly and add no emotion to the film, and some problems with the focus, which is noticeable on the last shot. Given the importance of that last moment, you could probably try to repeat the shot until you got the character focused.

    But it's a nice film, and the exercise your teacher proposed was brilliant! Keep them coming

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 21
    Last Post: 06-12-2012, 11:57 PM
  2. Replies: 9
    Last Post: 05-28-2012, 12:28 AM
  3. Replies: 11
    Last Post: 04-28-2012, 09:46 PM
  4. Replies: 2
    Last Post: 01-12-2012, 06:02 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •