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Thread: Volunteers? A Short Comedy

  1. #1

    Default Volunteers? A Short Comedy

    Hi everyone, I am new to the forum and would love your comments on my new short comedy "Volunteers?"
    Volunteers? [Short Film Comedy] - YouTube

    I also have a more experimental science fiction short that I just finished "A Rivulet in Time"

    [Link removed - please repost in a separate thread]

    I would love any comments or critiques that you have.

    Ryan Lebar
    quark and beans.
    Last edited by TimStannard; 04-24-2012 at 05:22 PM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Surrey, UK
    Blog Entries


    Hi Ryan and welcome.
    I trust you will also comment and critique other people's films. All comments are always gratefully received.

    Volunteers got my interest from the start but then very nearly lost me.

    The intro was slick, very well filmed and edited. But the main part of the film was waaaay too long for me. I know we're meant to feel his unease, his awkwardness, but for so long? The ending is a nice twist and very well handled. Heartwarming withouyt being too slushy. But the effect would have been much more so if the middle section hadn't dragged on. It really doesn't need it. We get the idea. Great story. Great filming. Superb acting. A minute too long.

    I have some comments on your second film as wellm, but the rules state only one film per thread in this section (so comments don't get confused). I've removed it. Please repost in a new thread.

  3. #3


    great filming and editing. the music was spot on .... really enjoyed this.
    Last edited by enc; 04-25-2012 at 05:47 PM.

  4. #4


    Very nice job. The performance from the guy was spot on. It wasn't too long for me, well may be a little but generally I was so grasped by the guys performance I didn't mind.

    Very Well done.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Smalltown, Queensland


    I was very impressed with the way you edited and directed the awkwardness. I agree with the other comments. I maybe think this was your aim in this piece - to portray those feelings, so that is possibly why you dwelled on it for a little too long?

    I look forward to your next piece when you post it

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