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Thread: January 2011: "Insert Credit" - Short Drama

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Currently: Stoke-on-Trent

    Default January 2011: "Insert Credit" - Short Drama

    A short drama I shot and directed for Media Production at Staffordshire University. Great fun and real experimental, hope you guys enjoy it!

    "A short drama starring Thomas Synnott-Bell.

    Oliverís slow, constant life as a twentysomething videogamer is interrupted one day by the theft of his treasured Mega Drive by a somewhat trying-too-hard thief; Oliverís rival, Tyler. Oliverís goal? To get his console back through any means necessary. Thomas Synnott-Bell stars in this exciting, fast-paced action comedy with a big heart and a retro-gaming feel. Will Oliver be defeated? Or will he level up?"

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Surrey, UK
    Blog Entries


    I trust everyone involved will get a merit or distinction. Excellent job all round, concept and execution.
    You managed to come up with a plot which had feasible reasons to show off a wide variety of genres and technical skills.
    I can't praise it enough.

    I can, however try to be picky (but this is really picky) and point out a few things to watch out for in future.
    I thought the sound was a bit unbalanced at times: compare Oliver talking to camera while taking a leak with his v/o immediately following.
    Some of it seemd to drag for no reason, it didn't add any tension (at least for me): the phone conversation, Oliver's journey to the meet are a couple of examples.
    Crossing the line: When Tyler throws the backpack he's throwing it left to right, but the following shot is Oliver catching it as it travels right to left.

  3. #3


    I agree a nice job but the sound balance is a bit of an issue for me as I watched it at work I have to turn the volume up to hear some points and then quickly turn it down for the loud bits. I liked the comic book titles like the Ring Ring from the phone, I think the use of split screen added the comic book feel which I'm sure was the intent.

    At 2:15 when you have the first ring you do a L or J cut i.e. we hear the sound then go to the image which is fine BUT half the animation has floated off the screen which I found distracting. I would either not have the animation on the first ring or I would cut to the phone sooner. If that makes any sense.

    A pretty well put together piece editing wise which kept my interest. I liked some of the more subtle touches you put into it as well.

  4. #4


    Fantastic ! cant fault it at all.

    care to share the tech details ?

    BTW, reminds me a lot of the bbc 2 series How Not To Live Your Life

  5. Default

    Really interesting I like the main actor's perfomance

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Currently: Stoke-on-Trent


    Cheers for all the kind words and constructive criticism - I can always count on you guys for it!

    I'm now aware of the audio issue...I think editing entirely through the iMac's built-in speakers might be an issue...might FINALLY be a good time for me to buy a decent set of Sennheisers, I suppose... :P

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2010


    The production was excellent, suitably directed, and edited. Was solid all round, bar sound at parts - as mentioned before. The only thing that I could critique is not really what is on question, I suppose - and that is the script...So, if that's not a concern of yours (after all you're on a TV production course, not a scriptwriting one :P), but I thought the dialogue wasn't very tight...the exposition could have tighter. If you're gonna write cheesy dialogue that states out of the blue backstory - really ham it up for comedy value, or just leave it out completely.

    Some subtext might be interesting as well. Rather than him staying the obvious...just that clever line: "I was always player 2" implies a lot - without having to have awkward dialogue. Less is always more with dialogue.

    I could see the Scott Pilgrim influences - but I really couldn't feel what tone you were going for. To me this felt like it couldn't decide if it was drama, comedy, or parody...or even horror at times. It shows off your technical skills - but bouncing between really serious drama (the reaction shots) and then whimsical farse didn't quite gel for me...of course it's probably just me. xD
    Last edited by Spiral Dementia; 02-26-2011 at 02:00 PM.

  8. #8


    Great video, really liked it!

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