uh-huh
Good first attempt - you made that more for you than for anyone else and that is fine.
I enjoyed it for what it was supposed to be, I got the kids laughing as they hop away bit in part 2 - but for the most part it made NO SENSE - take that as a sign of respect as I am not sure I cold possibly top it in the non-sequetor department.
Do you really want feedback on the technical?
here's a little:
1) When characters are speaking from in masks where the lips are not moving do it in voice over (ADR) in post production
2) In the opening scene of 2 there are two back to back shot of a character running towards the camera. When you do this it kind of confuses the audience as they don't get perspective - intermix a running at the camera with a running away or better yet a passing the camera, or a close up to reset the scene for the viewer
Script
1) Make it make sense damn it!
Oh and awsome job - keep it up you would be amazed where a little practice from home can get you. I wish I had started this xx years ago like you - look forwards to seeing a future work at a film festival!
The tale of my death has been greatly exagerated
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